I am now at the point of breaking. Waiting is driving me slightly crazy and if I have to wait any longer then I will surely forget how to physically move all together. It is as if I am stuck in a huge que at a supermarket, or a theme park, or better yet a doctor’s surgery, just waiting for my time to come around so I can get on with things and MOVE. Days, weeks and even months will go by and I will still be sat here, waiting, or at least that’s how it feels. So yeah, I pretty much HATE waiting.
At the moment I am actually just waiting for the time to pass so that I can once again order my Disclosure Scotland check, and once again send this off to my solicitor Allison, and then of course, to the government. As I have mentioned before, and as I will mention again, it is important to get the timing of your documents just right. You do not want to be too late ofcourse, but you also do not want to be too early, otherwise you will have to spend out even more money in applying for things all over again. This is the case with my Disclosure Scotland check, so please PLEASE bear this in mind if you are going through this process. Trust me, it will save you a hell of a lot of time and a hell of a lot of money. As I am spending most of my time waiting, this has also led me to spend a ridiculously large amount of time, thinking. Yes, thinking. I thought I’d mention this as no other blogs that I have read seem to.
Doubts. You will have doubts and it is perfectly normal to have them. This is something that anyone making such a dramatic change in their life will face. Is this the right thing to do? Am I making the wrong decision? Should I just stay here and pursue other interests? And probably the most daunting and doubt provoking question of all… what will I do when I come back? Also the question of what happens if I don’t like it, make no friends and ultimately want to sulk into my own pillow every night for pure dread of doing it all over again the next day. THAT’S IT I’M STAYING! ….No, no you are not.
I have been having these thoughts a lot lately, and many doubts but mainly because I don’t really want to leave the convenience of my comfortable and stable life here in London, and of course my wonderful Family and Friends. But, I have been re-assured by many people that it is perfectly natural to have these such doubts, so if you are feeling the same then I recommend reading more books about your chosen destination, or taking up a new hobby or a new course even. Waiting can be a terrible activity, especially if you’re slightly impatient like myself, when it comes to waiting that is.
So my advice: Fill the waiting time as much as you can, and do not doubt that you will have these doubts themselves. It will happen, and it will be horrific. But just remember, you started this journey for a reason. So say yes to life and continue what it is, that you want to continue.